Transparency

I have been challenging myself to write more, but I’ll admit, it hasn’t been easy. This post in particular, I’ve struggled with. You see, lately I’ve been asking myself what kind of blogger I want to be. Do I want to be… articulate, intelligent, funny (or all three)? If I am being brutally honest, there are days when I don’t feel like any of those things. Heck, there are days when I don’t feel like a very “triumphant” believer. I struggle with pride, with selfishness, with envy, with this “body of death”. This daunting realization is what moved me to write this post. I want to be transparent. That is what God calls us to be. What makes this so hard is that we like to be transparent only when we are feeling like our best selves. When I am that employee meeting every deadline and being praised for how amazing I am, or I am that wife with a home-cooked meal every evening for dinner and a delicious lunch packed for Sam every afternoon, or I am that mother who can make her 1 year old behave during the service- who does NOT fall asleep in the church nursery with drool running down her chin (yup, that really happened!)- that’s when I want to be transparent. I mean that woman sounds pretty darn amazing, right? Unfortunately, that’s not me. Not the every day me, anyway (but I do have my moments!). Not only did I fall asleep in the church nursery just last Sunday, but I also worked late almost every night last week. Right now as we speak, I am staring at an empty pizza box still lying on my dining room table.  Transparency. It’s not easy, but I believe that we glorify God more when we are being honest about our imperfections. However long the list may seem; however vulnerable we may feel! God’s strength is perfected in our weakness.. How’s THAT for amazing?!

So if your that wife with [insert fast food chain of your choice] lying around or that mom struggling not to cry (literally CRY) over spilled milk, juice, or whatever is within arm reach of your kid AGAIN (will we ever learn?)- or even if you’re single or a newly wed (I’ve been there too)- then I think we can be great friends. Sit back, relax, and let’s find joy in our imperfect journey!

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